Breaking up: When love turns to hate.


posted by sooyup

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I've had a break up. For me it went from 'Love or something like it' to 'No longer love and nothing else'. So when I hear 'I wish him death Linda, I wish him death, I hope he dies soon', I don't understand where that's coming from.



I was listening to her and crying; not for the man she wished death...(I knew she didn't really mean it, it was just anger talking), I was crying because of the deep pain I felt in her voice; the intence hatred, the extreme bitterness, the anguish, the sorrow, the confusion...but above all - the let down. "How could he do this to me?', I heard several times in the conversation "Where's my fairy tale ending Linda?" I also heard.


When someone we love deeply hurts us, we are expected to forgive them, and if we no longer want them in our lives; let them go, wish them the best and move on. But for some of us, it's not that easy. Once the love is gone, only hate remains. What I want to know is; where does the hate come from?

How can we go from - loving someone so much we marry them, have kids with them, spend the best years of our lives with them... - then turn around to hate them so much, we wish/want them dead. How can a love so deep turn so easily into the most intense hatred? What happens?
You find some divorced couples who can't stand the sight of each other and some actually go out of their way to try to bring the other down. And you wonder, was there ever love between these people?



At what point does love turn to hate? Why is the line between the two emotions so thin? And is the hate reversible? Does anybody out there have an answer?

Please share your thoughts...

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