Since I'm married - this doesn't apply to me - I was young and good looking (no really) and very athletic - and even showed up the football jocks a time or fifty in PE which set me up for an after school beating that somehow required three of them to gang up on me......I was (am) small - 5'6" and 130lbs but could run a 5:15 mile and do situps and pullups forever as well as was a marathon bike rider......(not anymore - but the older I get the better I was).....but I was.....a nerd.....a geek. Anyways - here's a tribute to my fellow geeks in the world - if you're not hitched yet - here's to hope. Some girl wrote this and somehow I ended up with it but here you go.
*****DISCLAIMER****** THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A NERD AND A FREAK AND A PSYCHO NUTCASE!!!! NERDS, GEEKS=OKAY. PSYCHOS, FREAKS, NUTCASES=BAD!!!! ******* PSYCHOS FREAKS AND NUTCASES = POTENTIAL STALKERS WITH THE TECHNOLOGICAL KNOW HOW TO DO IT***********
That being said....continue. I didn't write this - supposedly a girl did - or some really twisted guy. Either way....continue.....
1.) While geeks and nerds may be awkward, they're well-meaning 9 out of 10 times. That smooth dude with the sly grin and the spider hands? Wonder what HIS intentions are... plus, I've never had a geek guy not call me when he said he would. Score major points THERE.
2.) They're useful. In this tech-savvy world, it's great to have a b/f who can make your laptop, desktop, and just about anything else that plugs into a wall behave itself.
3.) They're more romantic than they're given credit for. Ok true, their idea of romance might be to make up a spiffy web-page with all the reasons why they love you, with links to pics of you and sonnets and such... but hey. It lasts longer than flowers, plus you can show your friends.
4.) Due to their neglected status, there are plenty to choose from. You like 'em tall and slender? There are plenty of geeks/nerds who are. You like 'em smaller with more meat on their bones? Got that too.
5.) They've got brains. Come on now, how can intelligence be a bad thing?
6.) Most are quite good at remembering dates. Like birthdates and such, especially if they know it'll make you happy. Due again to their neglected status, they're more attentive than guys who 'have more options'. Plus, with all that down time without a steady girlfriend, they'll likely have mental lists of all the things they'd love to do once they GOT a girlfriend.
7) (Edited) Something to do with a virgin wrote the Kama Sutra - someone with all that pent up time thinking about what they aren't getting - not likely to leave you "out in the cold."
8.) They're relatively low-maintenance. Most can be fueled on pizza, Twinkies and Mt Dew. No complicated dinners needed here, so if you're not the best cook, eh. Can you order a pizza?
9.) Most frequent bars as often as slugs frequent salt mines. You won't have to worry much about your geek guy getting his 'groove' on with club hotties because, frankly, he'll be too busy rooting around under his computer wondering where that spare cable went. You won't have to worry about him flirting with other women because, 9 out of 10 times, he'll zip right by them in a perfect b-line towards the nearest electronics store. I've seen this happen.
Me: 'Eww. Victoria Secret's Models... They're so skinny. How is that feminine? You can see her ribs!'
Geek Guy: 'ooooooo...'
Me: 'Hey!' *notices he is staring lustfully towards the computer store*
Geek Guy: 'What?'
Me: 'Never mind...'
10.) Although he may not want to go to every outing with you, you can arrange swaps, as in, you'll go to his Gamer Con dressed as an elf princess if he'll take you to the ballet. Plus, if he doesn't want to go someplace with you, you won't have to worry much about what he's up to. You'll probably come home to find him asleep on his keyboard in a sea of Mt. Dew cans with code blinking from the screen. It's ok. He's used to this. Just toss a blanket over him and turn out the light.
11.) His friends aren't jerks. I can't stress this enough. You'll more likely get 'Omg! A GIRL!! Can I see?!' than 'Hey hot stuff back that up here....' They're awkward geeks too and will, 9 times out of 10, treat you with the utmost respect and, more than likely, a note of awe. A cute girl picked one of their clan to date? It could happen to them! Hope! Drag some of your single girlfriends over, open up a pack of Mt. Dew, crack open the DnD set and get working. Nothing impresses geek guys more than a girl who can hack-n-slash (well ok maybe if she can code... a geek can dream).
12.) They're rarely if ever possessive. They trust you, so you can be yourself around them. You like to walk around the house in a ratty t-shirt for comfort? He won't care. He does too! They won't get upset if you don't wear make-up or don't want to bother primping your hair. If you gain a few pounds, they won't try their best to make you feel like crap.
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| Couldn't help myself but to put this in here |
14.) You'll almost never have to hear, 'Yaw dawg whazzap!!' plop out of their mouths. Unless it's in jest. They spell properly, use correct punctuation, and are able to tell the difference between the toilet and the floor. They almost never get 'wasted', so you won't have to worry about coming home to find him and his friends passed out on the floor amidst a pile of beer bottles. Mt. Dew cans, perhaps...
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| Look how happy they are! |
15.) And the final reason why geeks and nerds make great boyfriends: They actually give a damn about you. Not how you look (though that's a plus), not how skinny you are, not how much make-up you primp yourself up with, but they like you for you. That kind of thing lasts longer than 'DaMN baby!!!' Believe me.
